
I know the world as it really
is
Endless war, the human heart in flames
But your life is to me the sweetest water
When I swim in that water, I am an angel
To have you, to hold you…
“Oh…” Jerome
breathed. He felt sick. “Jesus fuck.” The profanity didn’t
make him feel any better. That man, that changed man… no, not a man.
There was no man anymore. Just… a (monster) thing. Something that he
couldn’t name, even in his thoughts. (Nnnn) Too dangerous, with it so
nearby. (don’t think) It might sense his attention.
Jerome turned his eyes away, looked at the park but refused to see anything.
Branches moved by the wind, limbs moving, brightly-clothed bodies bouncing
up and down… all just motion. Meaningless. Jerome’s mind went
blank, and he hummed a pop tune off key as he rapidly walked away (it’s
in your eyes). He didn’t think about where he was going, just allowed
his feet to automatically lead him somewhere else. Away from the thing.
Jerome walked until he found himself outside another café. Ten minutes
away from the park, a fashionable establishment for lawyers and businessmen
and other normal successful people whose careers Jerome imitated. He went
inside and found a secluded table.
Jerome found that the telephone number he’d memorised from the personals
was completely gone from his mind, but that didn’t matter now. He could
always buy another newspaper. Shaking slightly, he took the phone from his
inner jacket pocket and flipped it open. Some numbers Jerome would never forget.
Even though he dreaded using them. There was a lot about the work that he
enjoyed… but this, this gave him the horrors.
Jerome dialled, and the line connected. Rang three times, and then picked
up. Jerome automatically repeated the number he’d just dialled down
the line. A neutral male voice responded. “Good morning, Mister K. Do
you have something to report?”
Jerome swallowed, and cleared his throat. “Yes. I have sighted a hostile,
performing with a guitar in the park near the offices of my employers. I believe
it to be an ethereal.” He paused, rubbing the bridge of his nose.
“What do you want me to do?”
The advantage of your own office, Jerome reflected as he left it, was that
you didn’t have to share it with anyone who might notice how much work
you were doing at any given moment. That you’d finished as much of your
current projects as you possibly could for the day (at least until the database
engineers got back to him with the documentation he’d requested) and were
basically making yourself meaningless busywork to keep yourself occupied.
Or that you’d decided to have an early lunchbreak and gone to the park.
Unless something urgent came up (and Jerome doubted that it would, not with
half the directors in Brisbane until the end of the week), even if someone came
to his office looking for him, it was doubtful that Jerome’s presence
would be important enough that he’d be missed.
So he straightened his tie, took a random leather folder, arranged his face
in the manner of someone on his way to somewhere important, and walked briskly
through the lobby and out of the building. And went to the park.
Four blocks away, the park was still in the shade of office towers at this time
in the morning and therefore a bit chilly, but it was nonetheless alive with
human activity – people jogging, reading books on the grass, doing Tai
Chi, or just enjoying the relatively quiet goings-on of the open space. Jerome
saw a woman that he recognised near the fountain – not somebody from the
office, that would have been irritating enough to ruin his simple enjoyment
of the morning, but somebody that he had worked with in the past. It was highly
unlikely that any of Jerome’s fellowship would ever talk about their shared
work in a public place, but nonetheless Jerome’s forehead crinkled with
distaste.
Jerome didn’t like his work to intrude upon these moments of escape. Bad
enough that he never really got to enjoy a normal weekend. Jerome turned the
other way and walked counter clockwise around the border of the park, before
she saw and recognised him, and stopped only when he passed a newspaper kiosk.
Feeling a bit neglectful, Jerome gave a couple of coins to a politely smiling
woman at the kiosk and took a newspaper. He might as well make a token attempt
at being conscientious.
The city broadsheet was always awkward to read while walking, but much better
suited for his purposes. Jerome scanned the world news, not really looking for
anything. If something important had happened overseas then he’d be made
aware of it well before the signs became newsworthy. The local news held much
more of interest to Jerome, with its sordid crimes, controversies, and political
scandals occurring much as expected. The reassuring patterns and schedules of
a nation, obvious when you knew how to look for them.
A small note in the personals. Obviously not intended for him, but something
that he’d have to look into later. Jerome made a mental note of the telephone
number listed and left his newspaper on a nearby bench. He didn’t bother
to check his horoscope.
A late morning sun was beginning to peer from behind the surrounding buildings,
causing the cool shadows of the park to begin their retreat. Jerome’s
favourite outdoors café looked particularly enticing, with a sun-splashed
table now cleared of the last customer’s clutter that fairly begged his
attention. Jerome relaxed into the plastic chair and turned his regard to people
enjoying the park nearby. A couple of students, yet more joggers hastening past
in their endless pursuit of an ideal body, a bronzed young woman who appeared
likely to shed some of her unnecessary clothing once the air became warmer,
and a man with a guitar.
Jerome was interested in observing the young lady from behind his sunglasses
as she stretched out promisingly on a blanket, but his eyes kept returning to
the busker. He looked like a homeless man – multiple layers of shabby
clothing, hair shaved off savagely, and that subtle yet palpable demeanour that
caused passers-by to uncomfortably shift their eyes away rather than meet his
gaze. And yet, the busker had a guitar that had obviously seen some care, he
wasn’t wearing defeat and despair like a cloak, and he didn’t look
too filthy.
Jerome hesitated, then beckoned the waiter to his table. He purchased two sets
of sandwiches, two cold drinks. Jerome rarely bought lunch just for himself.
Although he enjoyed getting away from the people he worked for from time to
time, not to mention his supposed employers, Jerome hated to eat alone. So he’d
made it a habit to buy lunch for a stranger. Generally Jerome chose a homeless
person in the park who didn’t look too crazy or unpleasant to the senses.
It made Jerome feel good, these small acts of charity. Like he was able to make
a small difference in the life of someone he’d never meet again, as well
as the obviously more important work that he did. Change a life as well as work
towards changing the world.
With a moment of regret as he thought of the bronzed Amazon (who was now removing
one of her jumpers), Jerome waved at the guitar-player to catch his attention.
He smiled warmly, indicated the food that had been brought to him, and waved
the man over.
And suddenly loud thunderous words fill my head, his lips not moving…